i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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