Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize