Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He literally asked permission to hit on me
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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