i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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