bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize