I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
