real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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