never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize