if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
