Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
