She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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