Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
