Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
did i walk over a car last night?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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