Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Holy sore nipples Batman
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize
