You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
