Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ThatDirtyWater hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(720): View more from Colorado

you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!

Fav 10 3942 1189
share tweet
(660): View more from Missouri

Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...

Fav 12 4636 1363
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(301): View more from Maryland

and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit

Fav 8 4804 1294
share tweet
(518): View more from New York

I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny

Fav 2 1790 705
share tweet
(478): View more from Georgia

We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.

Fav 10 2017 956
share tweet
(727): View more from Florida

He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.

Fav 3 507 930
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(925): View more from California

All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.

Fav 3 687 519
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(440): View more from Ohio

Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.

Fav 5 362 482
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(920): View more from Wisconsin

if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.

Fav 0 34 5
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT