3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
