I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
