One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
