Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
