So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
