we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
is wine microwaveable?
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Randomize
