Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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