then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
