My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
