Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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