Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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