i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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