Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize