I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
it's not cheating when I paid for it
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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