we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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