escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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