just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize