How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
