Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
