I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
