Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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