a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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