you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize