oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
