What a fucking waste of an outfit
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
