plz talk dirty to me
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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