Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
Randomize