I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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