the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
