i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
