I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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