Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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