I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
