The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
