just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
