Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
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