Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..

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  (517): dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min.. http://tfl.nu/cx5p
  Replies (2) Good night (2068) Bad night (840)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes

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  (614): If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes http://tfl.nu/ijgu
  Replies (8) Good night (1048) Bad night (3318)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  dollar beers will do that to you.

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  (630): I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning. (1-630): dollar beers will do that to you. http://tfl.nu/e57v
  Replies (26) Good night (2745) Bad night (700)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Win!

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  (334): I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender. (205): Win! http://tfl.nu/0n6n
  Replies (12) Good night (5388) Bad night (895)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook

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  (205): Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook http://tfl.nu/0mxm
  Replies (24) Good night (3915) Bad night (780)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.

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  (218): I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that. http://tfl.nu/isuw
  Replies (31) Good night (5420) Bad night (2339)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.

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  (412): remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories. http://tfl.nu/emk4
  Replies (11) Good night (5872) Bad night (1326)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.

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  (301): My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it. http://tfl.nu/gp6s
  Replies (7) Good night (3256) Bad night (1184)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.

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  (580): And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities. http://tfl.nu/eu72
  Replies (10) Good night (2961) Bad night (874)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.

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  (651): It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face. http://tfl.nu/y5ia
  Replies (11) Good night (1671) Bad night (960)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?

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  (615): She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable? http://tfl.nu/4ysm
  Replies (7) Good night (760) Bad night (1263)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF

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  (304): Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF http://tfl.nu/pima
  Replies (5) Good night (1198) Bad night (639)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.

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  (319): I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window. http://tfl.nu/f99w
  Replies (2) Good night (1149) Bad night (549)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I'm gonna eat you out. But for science

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  (423): I'm gonna eat you out. But for science http://tfl.nu/34e6
  Replies (2) Good night (1095) Bad night (354)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices

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  (850): Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices http://tfl.nu/ay6e
  Replies (0) Good night (597) Bad night (271)

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